Once is an Accident, Twice a Coincidence, the Third Time it's ON PURPOSE.

Friday, October 1, 2010


IT APPEARS THAT NOW-FORMER CHIEF OF STAFF RAHM EMANUEL will get the last laugh on the floundering (pun intended) Team Obama. 

Today, The White House announced the worst-kept-secret in all of Washington D.C. that the execrable Chicago strongman and President Obama's most trusted confidant will depart to make a run for Mayor Richard Daley's soon-to-be-vacant seat in the Windy City. Daley, who held the position of chief crony in Chi-town for six terms, announced his decision to step down at the conclusion of his current term. 

Daley's public approval rating had recently taken a mighty hit with a recent poll showing over half of Chicago voters saying they don't want to see him elected again, and 47 percent saying they disapprove of his job performance. The mayor's administration has been slammed with an increase in violence, a sagging economy and the embarrassing failure - led by Obama himself - to land the 2016 Olympic Games. Gosh, sounds like the perfect fit for the ex-Obama-ite.

Never to be one to let a "good crisis go to waste", Emanuel announced his intention to jump right into the fray in competing for the coveted mayoral position -- not too unlike a contestant on "The Price is Right" sprinting down the aisle to have a chance at spinning the Big Wheel in hopes of qualifying for the Showcase Showdown. Make no mistake, big bucks are at stake for this winner-take-all round in Chicago, the land of corruption.

At today's White House news conference, President Obama took no time in declaring that Emanuel would be a "wonderful choice for mayor" and wished his top lieutenant well in that pursuit, hugging his diminutive political soul mate in a near-tearful goodbye. 

Watching Obama embrace his little buddy like that kind of reminded me of the movie True Romance when hitman lawyer Vincenzo Coccotti (played by Christopher Walken) kissed Clifford Worley (played by Dennis Hopper) on the cheek, right before he unloaded his glock into him. Coccotti then spit on Worley as he lay dead in a pool of his own blood.

Emanuel joins a parade of recent Team Obama defectors rushing to flee the S.S. Obama before it sinks any deeper into the cold, dark abyss. Preceding Emanuel was NEC director Larry Summers, economist Christina Romer, Office of Management and Budget director Peter Orzag, communications directors Ellen Moran and Anita "I love Mao" Dunn, along with the Salahi's new BFF, former social secretary Desiree Rogers.

Make no mistake, Emanuel will be sorely missed on The Hill. Not. 

We'll never forget those iconic moments, like when Emanuel, reacting to disgruntled congressional Dems grumbling about his inability to publicly relate Obama's over-reaching, big-government "successes" to a dim-witted public, called his fellow Dems, "F$#!ng retarded." Or when disgraced Rep. Eric Massa (D) of New York said of Emanuel, "He is an individual who would sell his mother to get a vote. He would strap his children to a front end of a steam locomotive." Of course, this remark came after Emanuel accosted Massa in the congressional gym showers, with a pointy, gremlin finger in Massa's chest, for not voting for President Obama's budget -- while both Emanuel and Massa were "naked as a jaybird." Ah, the fond memories.

Here's to hoping the screen door doesn't hit Emanuel in the ass on his way out.


1 comment:

  1. A more sinister and evil person I have never seen. Now, if he would only take Cass Sunstein with him. Chicago deserves both of them.
    BTW, I wish I were the person Emanuel had cornered in the gym shower. He wouldn't have any teeth to smile after poking me in the chest with his diminutive finger.